That kind of day.
Posted by pittgirl on 15 Jul 2008 | Tagged as: Annoying Burghers, Eye rolls
Let’s move on from the “Wouldn’t it be very ITCHY?!” discussion, shall we? I’m tired of thinking about what would happen if a yarn tampon was to unravel while lodged in … never mind.
The PG held a contest (with no prize really except seeing your name in the newspaper) for readers to come up with a phrase to replace the cliche “throw him under the bus.”
Why that cliche instead of other more worn out cliches like “like I need a hole in my head” or “Pittsburgh is a forward-thinking city” (seriously. Google that.), I have no idea.
But the winner. Wait. I mean the “winner” was… Ready?
Relationsnip.
Yes, relationsnip is the new “throw him under the bus!”
OMG. Did he just throw another interception?! He is relationsnipping his team!
Lordy! Would I like to relationsnip Marian Hossa!
Now, with a kickass (there’s a cliche I could use a replacement for) first place like the NOUN relationsnip replacing the VERB/ACTION PHRASE of “throw him under the bus”, I imagine second place is hella awesome, too:
“Fly him back on coach.”
[blink]
Did they only get two entries?
It gets better:
Dawn Richardson-Frank is simply sick and tired of “proactive.”
“How can someone act before acting? It’s absurd,” says Ms. Richardson-Frank, 39, of North Versailles. “We must throw the word ‘proactive’ under the bus.”
Dawn. Let me type slowly so that you will understand me. The word is not preactive, the word is PROactive. One can act before acting if one does one action to AVOID A SPECIFIC REACTION. For instance, if you know that your act of leaving your window open tends to allow a certain determined pigeon to enter your apartment and shit on your stuff, you could be PROACTIVE by closing your window, thus allowing you to avoid the actions of cleaning up pigeon poop and coaxing the bastard into your blender.
Do you understand, now?
God. DID EVERYONE TAKE STUPID PILLS TODAY?
27 Comments »
on 15 Jul 2008 at 3:30 pm 1.Joe said …
I did a Google search on relationsnip and the only results seemed to include sites that spelled relationsHip wrong.
I think the Post-Gazette is just making stuff up at this point.
on 15 Jul 2008 at 3:34 pm 2.jcubed said …
The stupid may get worse - we are nearing a full moon. At least that is what I am going to attribute it to.
on 15 Jul 2008 at 3:39 pm 3.bucdaddy said …
“Throw him under Jerome Bettis,” anyone?
Are there PAT buses still running in Pgh.? I thought they’d cut the last route.
on 15 Jul 2008 at 3:52 pm 4.Maria said …
“Relationsnip” makes me think of “relationshit.” As in, “I just got out of a three year relationshit. My ex wanted me to start using yarn tampons so I threw him under the bus. No, I’m not using the cliche…I literally threw him under the 59U.”
on 15 Jul 2008 at 3:58 pm 5.Ravishing Rick said …
Try putting the tampon in your favorite beverage of choice,let the string hang over the side of the glass for a few minutes and watch it swell up, I think thats what
happens “inside”
on 15 Jul 2008 at 4:05 pm 6.TBD said …
Is it the full moon? The heat? Or are we all just suffering from a bad case of the OTR syndrome? Or what would that be in the recyclable, knit, wash and re-wear world??
on 15 Jul 2008 at 4:11 pm 7.Gumbygirl said …
Throw him into the jaggerbushes!
on 15 Jul 2008 at 4:11 pm 8.windy city steel city said …
Ban these buzz words too:
Touch(ing) base
think outside of the box
paradigm shift
110%
Just typing the ones above is making me apoplectic enough to forget all the others I loathe.
Hep me aht here?
on 15 Jul 2008 at 4:13 pm 9.Ravishing Rick said …
It really makes you wonder why women get soooooooooooooo
irritable when they get there monthly visit from there friend is it because they get bloated and fat and also have IBS ??????
on 15 Jul 2008 at 4:22 pm 10.Joe said …
I know who I wouldn’t mind throwing under a bus, people who use there when they mean their and your when they mean you’re.
on 15 Jul 2008 at 4:39 pm 11.joey said …
Move forward.
on 15 Jul 2008 at 4:42 pm 12.Muddypelican said …
windy:
Low hanging fruit
At the end of the day…
Poke him in the belly (that may just be our co.)
on 15 Jul 2008 at 5:42 pm 13.bucdaddy said …
windy,
You’d have to kill all managers.
on 15 Jul 2008 at 5:49 pm 14.Mitch Cumstein said …
Frankly, I think the whole idea of sewing your own feminine hygiene products has become rather cliched and I’d like to throw Miss Itchy-Crotch under the bus.
But seriously, the whole “green” thing is becoming a little tired now, isn’t it?
Also, I’m a little behind the times, but I don’t even know what relationsnip is…
on 15 Jul 2008 at 6:01 pm 15.Sooska said …
I needed to see the PG’s explanation so I looked up the original article and this is what the winner had to say:
“This was the result of one of my own silly typos — relationsnip, an abrupt breakup, for whatever reason,” says Ms. Brovey, 51, a professional translator from South Park.
We liked her term for the swift severing of a relationship.
The PG liked a FREAKIN’ TYPO as their winner. I will throw the PG under the bus, The Bus, or the 64B. I will not “relationsnip.” I am not Lorena Bobbit.
on 15 Jul 2008 at 7:12 pm 16.Ravishing Rick said …
Did she say relationship:
1:relationship-
A legal form of prostitution where a female collects money, cars, and other valuable things in exchange for sex.
2:relationship-
The reason for 70% of suicides in America.
3:relationship-
1. any type of connection that brings two individuals together for a period of time
2. something other than a friends with benefits
3. more than a mutual understanding!!
4:relationship-
The most un-sturdy and uncertain vessel to navigate through any ocean of the heart. While the warm winds of prevailing love and romance blow favorably through its sails, this un-seaworthy vessel steers ahead with pride and promise. But upon hitting rough and stormy weather, too often the relationSHIP flounders and sinks.
If you’ve yet to experience a relationship, then an example will do little to help you understand.
on 15 Jul 2008 at 7:55 pm 17.scottie said …
I’d like them to stop using “It is what it is.” F’ing circular references like that annoy me. No F’ing Sh*t, if it is what it isn’t then it wouldn’t be it, would it?
on 15 Jul 2008 at 10:52 pm 18.chrys said …
relationsnip sounds like a kinder word for “penis removal”
on 16 Jul 2008 at 2:39 am 19.gunnlino said …
Too many people with too much time on their hands and indulge the Post Gazettes lack of anything worthy to publish except reprints from other newspapers.
on 16 Jul 2008 at 7:07 am 20.The Dude said …
Pittgirl,
There were 68 responses to that yarn tampon post at this time. Was that a record? Can you easily find out what post did receive the most?
on 16 Jul 2008 at 7:29 am 21.pittgirl said …
No, not a record. There have been other posts that went well above 68 or even 100 comments posted. By far, the record is held by this post about Benny, which is still going strong at 994 comments.
http://theburghblog.com/2007/02/05/bens-new-girlfriend/
on 16 Jul 2008 at 8:39 am 22.Messier said …
yea I got relationsnipped by my girlfriend. Together for three years and now she won’t give me the time of day.
..
meh.
on 16 Jul 2008 at 9:18 am 23.Zsa said …
“Relationsnip” sounds disturbingly like a Sniglet. I hope Rich Hall sues her ass.
“Throw him under the bus” hasn’t been around nearly long enough to be thrown under the bus, IMO.
on 16 Jul 2008 at 11:24 am 24.zarum said …
Windy city steel city, mine is “share”
e.g. Why don’t you share that with the rest of us?
Just freakin’ tell us!
on 16 Jul 2008 at 11:40 am 25.emstef23 said …
Seriously….995 posts about who the Duke is dating? Do we really care?
Honestly people….
on 21 Jul 2008 at 9:46 am 26.deegazette said …
Can we start a movement to ban CLOSURE.
on 21 Jul 2008 at 8:42 pm 27.Ravishing Rick said …
CLOSURE
1. To attempt to ‘move on’ following the termination of a relationship with another individual.
2. When used in a sentence, insinuates that the individual using the word is the same individual who was the target of the ‘break-up’.
3. A word used by overly-emotional, self-centered ‘drama queens’ (mostly women and gay men).
4. Individuals using this word generally will utter the word ‘chapter’ during their often one-sided conversations.
5. A word created during the 90’s which was borne out of individuals unable to cope with relationship failure.
6. Individuals using this word insinuate that the more stable party is responsible for all of the ‘closured’ individual’s problems, as well as the War in Iraq, airbag safety issues, the Democratic National Convention, dustless chalk, nipples on men, PMS, and bad-hair days.